A Glimpse

Into My Insanity

"I know what I want to be when I'm done with school."

"A baseball player?"

"No. A nudist...will you support me in my dream?"

"Sure."

"Will you still support my dream
if you have to bail me out of jail when I leave the colony without clothes on?"

My middle child...
he dreams big.

Just

Because

it's finals week,

and my sweet son is also working his way through college,

and we love him immensely,

and his caloric intake never seems to keep up with his metabolic output,,

and I wish I could make his life easier,

and it's the small gestures that matter,

he had "Sunday night dinner" on a Monday afternoon!

Sometimes

Sometimes
I see friends' children who are 16 years old,
and I realize what a fearful, gut-wrenching year that was in my sweet son's life.

Sometimes
it just hits me,
and it takes my breath away.

Sometimes
I meet a child who is a sophomore in high school,
and I realize that was the year my sweet son's life changed forever.

And sometimes
it just hits me,
and it takes my breath away.

Sometimes
this is tough.

Thankful

Enough

Give thanks in all circumstances.
1 Thessalonians 5:18

Give thanks always?
And in every situation?

Even when
You are settling in a new land?
And you are scared?
And the winter winds blow through the cracks?
And famine is unrelenting?
And disease is destroying your dreams?

Give thanks in all circumstances.

Give thanks always?
And in every situation?

Even when
The CT scan is ominous?
And the MRI is worse?
And surgery is unsuccessul?
And the diagnosis shattering?
And there is no cure?

Give thanks in all circumstances.

For thankfulness leads to
Joy.
And joy leads to
Hope.

Hope is all we need.

Hope is
Enough.

Thoughts from November 2006,
still true today.

Did you know

that my
sweet smiling,
book reading,
peace loving,
disease fighting,
deep thinking,
soft speaking,
cause finding,
soccer playing,
movie watching,
scar wearing,
knowledge bearing,
son

is also environmentally friendly?

Today

Today...

...I poked and prodded my little girl out of her sleepy dreams.

...I laundered many pieces of clothing.

...I shopped for various goods still needed for our feast.

Today...

...I waited patiently in a waiting room.

...I received a great biopsy report.

...I bought numerous bottles of sunscreen.

Today...

...I lunched with friends, new and old.

...I had the opportunity to talk "VHL" for over two hours!

...I dried many tears on my drive home.

Today
was special.

Freudian Slip

Today I ordered a

"Quarter Pounder Happy Meal."

Even the sweet boy
at the drive-through window
knows
that I'm decomposing
rapidly
at the reality
that my babies are
growing up.